In the past 6 months I have climbed an 8 foot fence, crossed creeks by using a giant log, run through the woods in pursuit of an ROTC group, crawled, climbed, and fallen my way through my job.All while carrying a really expensive camera that isn't technically mine. A few months ago I stood outside in the rain photographing a construction site, where I probably contracted bronchitis. Tomorrow I'm photographing baby otters. Next week, next month... who even knows?
What the fuck am I doing with my life?
Are these things even in my job description?
I haven't the faintest. Yet somewhere, underneath my grumblings about the cold weather and the rain and the inability to get certain people to talk to me, I enjoy myself. I enjoy wandering through the woods and climbing fences and running to work on a deadline. I enjoy the fact that I get to meet so many interesting people, so many new faces. I get to see these people when I go to class or when I cover a new event -- people start to recognize me.
In a sense it scares me. I went from being the most antisocial person on the planet to being in a profession that requires me to be completely immersed in social activity. I went from no job to working nearly full-time. I went from looking at photography as a hobby to look at photography as a potential profession, and I thoroughly enjoy every step I'm making in that direction.
Someone asked me once, whether or not I hated my job and the fact that it kept me working nearly non-stop, the fact that I had no idea what I was going to be doing tomorrow or over the weekend. My friends asked me whether or not I hated suddenly not having a social life, or not being able to pursue a hobby that I enjoyed.
I simply told them no. No I did not hate my job, no I did not hate the hours that I worked, and no I did not hate that I was suddenly busy. I fucking loved it. It was something that I suddenly became passionate about, something that, despite some of the losses, was worth it.
Besides: I don't engage in something that I find worthless.
Sure, it was stressful at times, it was hectic, I lost a lot of friends. Sometimes I want to rip out all of my hair and throw in the towel, but then I realize I don't actually want to do that. Where would I be if I quit? I would be out some great friends, good times, and experience.
Working where I work, I have so many amazing coworkers and so many opportunities. And after all, how many people get to say that they love their job and the people they work with?
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